“Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the
One who makes me who I am”

That verse in Philippians somewhat sums up a lot of what I’ve been thinking about and struggling with. Before that Paul says “I’ve learned the secret of being content in any and every situation,” and my biggest struggle here is trying to find that secret of just being content with where I am. I will expand on this with a few examples.

I’ve realized that not many people are content with where they are. This is represented by a lot of conversations I have with people here that go somewhat like this.
Frenchy-“So have you been to New York?”
Me- “I’ve never been to New York City, but I’ve been to New York state”
Frenchy-“There’s a New York State?”
Me-“Uh..ya, it’s pretty big actually”
Frenchy-“Oh well New York is probably the best place in America, I definitely want to move there someday”
My thoughts-“And everyone in New York thinks Paris is the greatest place on earth and probably wants to move there too, but then when you switched you would both realize that you were happier where you started, and living in a city so draped in legend isn’t so great after all”

I guess that just goes along with what I said in an earlier post, about this exchange being a Christmas present. I spent so much time over the past year thinking about and wishing I was in France, all the while neglecting the fact that I was in the present moment living a perfectly happy life in (what I think is) the greatest place in America, and could die at any moment, so me wasting my time on the future was just that, wasting time. We spend so much time looking for that next stage in life, the next best thing, that we forget that nothing in life is guaranteed, not tomorrow, and definitely not next year. I think in order to really end the habit of always living in the future is to practice living in the present in the smaller things in life. Eating a meal and cherishing it as maybe the last meal you’ll ever eat, savoring every bite and being thankful, instead of simply pounding it down to satiate hunger and simply moving on to the day’s next activity. Or, while reading, simply taking in each page, each sentence, without worrying about when the chapter ends or what page you’re on. Only when we’re content with the little aspects of our life can we move on to be content with the overall. I think Gandalf says it best in the Lord of the Rings, "…All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us." Or Dumbledore in Harry Potter says it pretty well too, “It does not do to dwell on dreams, Harry, and forget to live.”

I said in my last post that I was a little homesick, which was true. Something random that my host mom said really made me think about that though. She was talking about how it gets annoying to always be cleaning, but then added a disclaimer that she wasn’t complaining, as so many people would give so much to have a nice apartment. Sometimes there are those things that people say that stick out in your mind, that they’ll probably never remember saying, but for some reason stick in your mind. I just started thinking that, although it is normal to miss home, I have absolutely nothing to complain about. At least I have a home to miss, a lot of people I see every day on the streets of Paris don’t even have that.

Last night I went to a big party that everyone in my class (the 30ish kids I spend most of the day with) and it was extremely fun. Being around them outside a school setting was relieving, as they are all so nice and fun to be around. There honestly isn’t one I dislike. There was a lot of dancing, which was really fun, as any song with English (in other words every song) I was expected to sing along to (although I knew less words than they did) because, well, I’m the American kid. But I was sitting there, and it suddenly popped into my head that I wouldn’t have rather been anywhere else. Just being with all these people that are so fun to be around, laughing, dancing, speaking French, being in France, and being in Paris on a beautiful night. I felt a little of what it was to be completely content in my circumstances, although I will admit it’s a lot easier to be content having fun than it is to be content going to high school. But you have to start somewhere!

So sorry if this is a little deeper than you may have expected, it’s just something I’ve been thinking about a lot and wanted to share it with you (plural).

Thanks for listening friends


Brent

P.S I am visiting Tyler in 3 days, although for these next three days I’m going to have to work on being content where I am, and not spend all my time thinking about vacation!